Friday, June 26, 2015


I have been in a platform craze lately.  And these flatform sandals are no exception!  I mean who doesn't want to extend those legs for days?  They go so perfectly with this shirt dress I picked up from Forever 21 a few years ago, featuring that rose taupe shade I obsess over and a flattering fit when belted to show off an hourglass shape.  I don't know about you, but I find that the older I get, the pickier I am with colors, fabrics, quality and fit.  I suppose it would have to do with how I've embraced my body more than ever before and know how to dress it in a more flattering way instead of fighting the curves like I used to!  I used to buy clothes that didn't look good on me simply because they were the style I wanted to wear.  But now I just find my own version of the style I like that works for my body type.  And avoid any clothes that are made for a straight figure.  Because I have boobs and a booty going on and some brands will never work for me!  I've found many brands that I love that make me feel flawless.  Here's a tip for all you girls with a butt - check out J Brand, Genetic Denim and American Eagle Outfitters' jeans (high rise for American Eagle), they will make you so happy... 

On a different note, my shame monster has been kicking my ass this week!  
Have you ever sat there thinking about the 10 things you failed at that day, or that week, or everything you could've done differently or better and beat yourself up about it?  Or how about a healthy boundary you made with a coworker but they didn't like your act of being a powerful person and it made you feel terrible, that you did something wrong when all you did was stick up for yourself!  Maybe you were vulnerable and honest with someone about they're affecting you, but they didn't like what you had to say and so you felt so bad that you wonder if it's even worth speaking up like that.  Ever?  Yeah, that's what my shame monster is like.  Shame is one of fear's many cousins, and we all have fear coming at us at one angle or another.  Shame makes me want to crawl into bed, curl up and sleep forever.  It reminds me of a school teacher who walks around with a heavyweight ruler and when you get a question wrong, *thwack,* wacks you on the head and then comes back around and *thwack*, hits you again for absolutely no reason!  Over and over and over again.  It makes me feel like I'm on the defense all the time, ducking and covering and executing the fastest army crawl I can conjure up away from this punisher.  It's absolutely exhausting.

That's no way to live.
  As I learn to recognize the times I'm being lied to by this voice - who is not my friend - an anger rises up in me to fight back.  To live life not on the defense, but to find the weapons I need to battle on the offense as the powerful, strategic, calculated and bold woman that I'm meant to be.  But if I spend too much time alone in my head and not externally processing in order to expose this abusive voice that's berating me constantly, I feel terrible.  It squelches the life out of me and the natural confidence I have.  I'm covering this topic today to shine a light on some debilitating voices you may be listening to.  Fear comes in many flavors.  I'm sure yours is a different version than mine, but it's all coming from the same tormentor.  Fear wants to hold you back, shut you down, and keep you in the dark, alone.  The first step is to expose those voices, recognize them as powers coming against us, that this isn't me, there's nothing wrong with me, I'm not crazy and unstable.  This is key.  They are the enemy.  Fear is only powerful as long as it's hidden and secret.  It's forced to loosen its grip when we realize the truth and have others standing by us, holding up our banner in battle and reminding us of who we really are, not who fear tells us we are.  We have too much to accomplish, too many lives to impact, and too much to conquer in this lifetime.  We don't have time for this shit!  


Photos by Megan Walton

Shirt dress: Forever 21 (cute ones herehere and here!)
Jacket: Pacsun (love this and this one)
Flatform sandals: ASOS (similar ones here and here)
Clutch: Clare Vivier
Belt: Love this one by Madewell 

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